The only piece of advice I really treasure

Some time ago, inspired by all the lists of tips and suggestions for the new year resolutions I read and heard everywhere, I created my own half-serious suggestions list.

Do you remember?

https://stillrocking.wordpress.com/2016/01/13/good-advice/

https://stillrocking.wordpress.com/2016/01/17/insomnia-and-creativity/

I do not reject those pearls of wisdom, but I think that they are not as inspiring as I wished.

Today I stumbled upon a Mark Twain’s quotation I already knew, but that struck me as if I read it for the first time:

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

It’s a fact that every century has its dreamers, inventors, visionaries. Depending on the time, they are and were treated in every possible way, from torture, derision, to awe, to suppression. But they all had something in common: the ability to go beyond the surface, to dare, to dream.

When Steve Jobs spoke the famous words, “Stay hungry, stay foolish!” he managed to sum up the unique philosophy of life that makes sense for me in a very short sentence.

The hunger for life accompanied by a certain amount of recklessness is not madness, it is the engine that should drive us to appreciate this journey, enjoying every opportunity, no matter who we are, where we live, how much money we have. What is appreciated by someone can be totally indifferent to another one.

Here is my list of what I have “explored” in recent years and that has enriched my life:

  •  create my own blog
  •  sing in a group
  •  practice Tai-chi
  •  practice Krav-maga
  •  discover the free online resources about meditation, energy techniques, motivational courses
  •  publish a household satirical magazine
  •  find resources that have inspired me to take care of my family and my home with no help
  • free myself from “reversed bias” (explanation follows) and learn to enjoy activities that I lived as a duty until a few years ago
  •  not being scared by washing machine and dishwasher breakdowns – yes, that’s right: as long as I can manage on my own, I will do it, screwdriver and clamp in my hand
  •  learn to say NO
  •  learn to let go of friendships that are fading
  • make room for new people, new ideas, new inspirations

None of this is making me rich (at least not yet …), less tired or perfect, but certainly eager to see what awaits me every morning.

And the great thing is that, the more I walk on this road, the longer becomes the trail of influences, imposed thoughts, unnecessary hesitation that I leave behind.

Even the “reversed bias” I mentioned before are terrible. Because of them we refuse “a priori” certain experiences, because we rebelled against them.

Take for example cooking. You already know what I think about it:

https://stillrocking.wordpress.com/2016/02/03/grandma-josephines-sweet-treats-i-e-my-opinion-about-cooking-sites/

But when I try (“explore”) some new recipe, I like it! Just as I like it when the outcome of one of my pieces de resistance is confirmed for the umpteenth time.

Until some time ago I hated to cook, because as a girl I was surrounded by people who gave too much value to this ability. And I thought, “You bet your @$$ you will never see me sweating in the kitchen in this way.”

Life then took me to a certain point where I had to cook twice a day, lunch and dinner, every single day. For me it was a nightmare.

But one day, just for fun, I tried some cake recipes and it felt good. From then on I started experimenting and at some point I realized that after all cooking was not that bad and I could not believe that I had regarded it in this way for my whole life.

Cooking was not tiring, holding on to an idea that no longer belonged to me was.

Have I made you smile with this new article? I hope so, but I also hope that I’ve been able to make you feel the intensity I live everyday life with. This does not preserve me from living dark moments, but it gives me an awareness of the great light we can enjoy every day.

Have a nice weekend!

Memories…to forget

Welcome back!

Lately I find myself more and more involved with people who keep thinking about the good old days. Whether they talk about music, family memories, travel, objects, it always seems that the present will never have a chance to match the magic and perfection of the past. Poor present… we often forget that it is the only time in our lives where we can intentionally act to improve things.

I hate memories with no purpose. Memories of this kind only lead to nostalgia and melancholy.

I dare even to say that I would erase them if I could. I know very well that every experience makes me what I am today and if I erased some memories I would be like a puzzle with missing pieces. I would become, if this is possible, even more incomprehensible to me.

In spite of my ideas about it, I find myself identifying in the past: I am the person who has suffered this loss, I am the person who has had this accident, I am the person who has been dismissed …

Do you notice something? The bitterest memories are tied to negative situations. I have read somewhere that at least five positive experiences are necessary to psychologically balance one negative experience. I think this is not entirely true either. Maybe in the present, but not for distant memories.

For example, being treated in a rude and unfriendly way in a store is not a good experience and, whether you react or you remain speechless, it is difficult to get rid immediately of what happened. However, if during the day you receive five manifestations of kindness or affection in other situations, the memory of how you have been treated in the store could disappear. Maybe it could be even useful in order to choose whether to go back or not.

It is very different when the memory is linked to a past trauma. In these cases so many factors come into play (sights, smells, sensations) and it is hard to find a good solution for everyone.

I found great help in a technique called EFT Tapping. You can find my articles here:

https://stillrocking.wordpress.com/2015/11/03/this-makes-me-feel-good/
https://stillrocking.wordpress.com/2015/11/23/well-being-tai-chi-and-eft/
https://stillrocking.wordpress.com/2015/11/24/well-being-tai-chi-e-eft-part-2/

If you are interested in experiencing EFT, have a look at the link below regarding the 8th Tapping World Summit, starting on Monday, February 22. This is a totally free series of lectures and guided practices for those who want to get closer to this technique.

http://www.thetappingsolution.com/2016VideoSeries/

But there are also memories of beautiful experiences that make us happy in difficult times and that encourage us in creating others.

These are the memories to look back to from time to time, with the knowledge that even with small gestures of everyday life, we can help build the good memories of tomorrow.

These are not rhetorical words I assure you. Even in the darkest moments of my life, I have always tried to find a little light in every gesture, made or received, and if I could not find it, I would simply go on.

Life after all is the relationship with ourselves and every relationship requires love, commitment and patience. If we are willing to do this for the people we love, we must do the same with ourselves.

Take care of the person you are and choose the memories you want to keep with you. For everything else look for the right way to get rid of it.

Some experiences will stay with you forever, but you have the right to ensure that they do not hurt your soul every time you remember them.

 

Well-being: Tai-chi and EFT – part 2

During my acitvity in the field of natural remedies and techniques, I often get in touch with people asking me for magical solutions for any kind of problems.
Unfortunately, many people disguise themselves as healers for every ailment, be it physical or psychological.

I am not one of these. Every time I learn about a new technique, I am very cautious.

I do not eat frog tails or snakes’ tongues and I do not believe that a massage or a certain position are enough to cure a disease.

Yet there are some natural remedies, some physical activities (e.g. Tai-chi) and massages and stimulations that can have a strong impact on our physical and psychological well-being and solve some discomforts.

I’ve always been curious about acupuncture, a method that was unknown to the medical western culture until a few decades ago.

The possibility to have access to our body’s internal parts noninvasively is fascinating. Through the acupuncture points, we can improve our health in many ways.

All these points are situated along the meridians and, although this has always been a much used treatment in the Traditional Chinese Medicine, experiments have only recently shown that there actually is a third “circulation system”. Isn’t that incredible?

The same points can be stimulated through pressure or tapping and these techniques can be very useful as “domestic first aid” for colds, headache or upset stomach too.

When stimulated, some points can give relief in stressful situations. These points are on the head/face and the upper part of the torso.

At the beginning of the 90’s in America, some experiments were made combining therapy with the stimulation of these points and the results led to the elaboration of the EFT principles.

The basic concept of the EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) is to free our experiences from an excessive emotional burden, which in the end can be the culprit not only of psychological problems but also of physical discomfort.

As I wrote in the introduction “This makes me feel good!” I like Nick Ortner’s The Tapping Solution.

This technique has many advantages: it can be easily learned, it is very helpful for stress-management and it can help us find clarity in our experiences.

There are many sites and videos where this technique is explained, but if you want you can send me a private message on Facebook / Linda Jett (Stillrocking) and I will be happy to give any further information.

In conclusion, my well-being formula is:

Tai-chi+EFT+Krav Maga.

What’s yours?

Have a nice week!

This makes me feel good!

Hello!

Today I would like to introduce the topic of my next articles: well-being.

It would be great to know exactly what we need to be in a state of physical and psychological well-being, but often it is a life-long search, because we are ever-changing beings.

There is a lot of talking about meditation and relaxing techniques and I must confess that I am a big fan of these. Every time I’ve come across this kind of information I have always gone deeper to see if it was something right for me.

In the next articles, I will talk about this topic and how to find the space for these activities and techniques in our everyday life (do you remember the 10 minutes?).

In the last few years, I got very interested in three activities: relaxation through muscles movements, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and Tai-chi.

In the first one, you achieve a very deep state of relaxation through muscles tension and release. It is not a very well-known technique and, even though it is easy to master it, it is better to attend a class.

EFT is widespread and the basic technique is explained very clearly in many videos you can find on YouTube. I personally follow Nick Ortner’s The Tapping Solution.

I also practice TAI CHI.

So in the next articles I will talk about Tai-chi and Eft.

They both have a connection with the Traditional Chinese Medicine. This connection is direct for Tai chi, while Eft has been inspired by it.

One of the basic concepts of the Chinese Medicine is the energy called “Chi” or “Qi” that flows through a net of meridians, the energetic channels.

On these meridians, there are many points that can be stimulated to balance the energy flow. To do this you can use for example acupuncture or pressure.

As for all topics I have written about, I will talk about these, because they are part of my life and make me feel well. Through my words, I try to encourage and inspire you, in this case to find your source of well-being without prejudices.

A martial art and an energetic technique? If they work for me what’s wrong with it?

I give this explanation, because I think that it is not right to give ourselves any kind of limits.

For instance, you know I love reading and I read anything.

At the seaside, I also happen to read gossip magazines and maybe in my bag I have Joyce’s Ulysses. What’s wrong with it? One makes me laugh, the other…well I still don’t know how Ulysses makes me feel, but this is another story… Anyway, they are both entertaining for me.

I hope I have intrigued you!

See you soon!